by CONNIE TABBERT
Editor
COBDEN — Hope Boxes have found their way into Whitewater Wesleyan Community Church near Cobden.
These are shoe-size boxes filled with materials that offer a sense of hope for a woman who has suffered an early loss during pregnancy or a late pregnancy/early infancy loss, explained Jenn Good from the church.
Last fall during a ladies retreat at the church, the women heard about the Hope Boxes and decided this was a project they wanted to participate in, said Brianna Beebe.
Inside the boxes are a variety of resources for a woman who is grieving, Ms. Beebe said. There is information on counselling and bereavement from the organizations Hope Mommies and First Step Options, she said. The boxes are Christian based, so there is also a bible with verses of comfort high-lighted, a music-filled CD, a keepsake, tea, candles, a journal and a note from a mom who has experienced loss, Ms. Good added.
In the box for late pregnancy/early infancy loss , there is also a blanket, hat and sweater for the child, she said.
The women have given out about 30 boxes to women who are grieving, those who had a recent loss and some who lost a child many years ago, Ms. Good said. People have been responding since hearing about Hope Boxes, she said.
“There are some women who have carried the loss for years and are now getting boxes,” she said.
Ms. Beebe noted most of the women in the group who are creating the Hope Boxes have experienced the loss of a child. Generally, women feel so alone when they lose a child, she said.
For some women, the box will be set aside until they are ready to go through it, and she noted that could be years, while some women will open the box right away hoping to find comfort, she said.
“And that’s what we are hoping, that these boxes are a source of comfort to these women,” Ms. Beebe said.
People are greatly affected by the loss of a child, whether it’s only a few weeks, just prior to birth, or even just after, she said.
“We want women to know there is hope,” Ms. Good said. “When a woman miscarries, there is always a feeling of being alone.”
However, they realize fathers also suffer and recently began placing items in the box for them as well.
When the committee was formed at the church and the boxes were ready, Ms. Good said she was surprised to learn how many women, in her church alone, have suffered the loss of a child, unbeknownst to many in the church..
“There is the excitement of pregnancy and then with the death of the child, there is the loss of dreams for their child, the loss of expectations,” she said. “It’s crushing and devastating.
“A mom and her baby are connected right away,” Ms. Good added. “Many begin plans for their child right away.”
Ms. Beebe said some moms who have experienced early pregnancy loss sometimes feel as if people think they shouldn’t be mourning the loss of a child, because it was just a tiny speck.
“But you have to remember, that child did exist,” Ms. Beebe said. “It doesn’t hurt less because she didn’t hold her baby. The loss is significant no matter how early or late.”
The two women believe there is a lot of stigma against talking about a miscarriage and they hope this is changing. They know when women gather, many times there is at least one conversation about the loss of a child, whether it’s early in the pregnancy or later.
“There is always that pain of losing a child,” Ms. Good said. “We hope this box shows people it’s okay to have the pain. We know you are hurting and we hope what’s in this box will provide comfort and support.”
The group is hopeful of getting these boxes into hospitals and doctors offices, medical centres and clinics, she said.
A Hope Box can be requested by a mom or someone else for the mom, Ms. Beebe said. There is a Facebook page, wwcc hope boxes, people can join to learn more about the Hope Box, or the church website, www.wwcc.ca.
