When I was barely into my twenties I received a Christmas present from my Aunt Helen. It was book, “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” by Dale Carnegie. I set it aside for a few years before I started reading it. After not that many chapters, I noticed I was worrying about things that I never worried about before. I put a halt to the reading and tried to give the gift away but no takers.
For some reason I looked into self-help books in general and discovered there were hundreds of them. All claimed to be the best with proven help for any difficulty or hardship anyone had encountered. I wondered if these books were really for the readers or to line the pockets of the author? They covered almost every topic under the sun from various angles.
Many prescribed peace of mind, spiritual enlightenment and mindfulness: Designed to change you into a different persona which is not what you needed but only to be better at who you are now. Other topics were how to get rich, became a raging success and an important manager (that was liked). I was curious about “How to Win Friends and Influence People” – especially getting others to agree with me. It was again by Dale Carnegie who became very rich with the sale of his books.
They even had one on the bible of bodybuilding by Arnold Schwarzenegger. Maybe Arnold was a skinny runt before he wrote it. “The Inner Game of Tennis” was by an author who didn’t play tennis.
One book was called “How to Master the Wheel of Life.” The Wheel of Life is a handy, visual way to compare different areas of life and get a quick idea of how unbalanced or balanced you are. I wondered if I could become a ‘Big Wheel.’ Actually my last part-time job was at CTC. My brother was the only one to refer to me as a wheel but not in a positive way. However the one entitled “When Things Fall Apart” would likely be more applicable.
“The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by John M. Gottman hasn’t had much effect on the public. Breakups and marriages have become a dime a dozen. Just take a look at your own social group to count how many couples are in second or third round. The smarter ones held themselves to two.
It had to happen. “Sex-Smart” is a text to help you find that understanding, whether you struggle with a sexless marriage or relationship, fear sex, or have anxiety about your intimate relationships. Almost a companion book, “Unlocking Erotic Intelligence,” by Esther Perel states that desire and passion can be the hallmarks of a strong marriage, but when that desire turns outside the marriage bed, it can make any marriage take a turn for the worst. You’d wonder if these authors have first-hand experience in the topic that they write about.
“Personality Plus” is one that is a little tempting. It gives you valuable insight for appreciating your one-of-a-kind personality. It also reveals how your unique blend of traits affects your emotions, work performance, and relationships. Through humorous anecdotes and straightforward guidance, It leads you to improve upon your strengths and correct your weaknesses Many of these persons I know or knew. Most I didn’t like as I figured they were trying to impress their own ego versus my own! My approach was different: If I wanted to get to know a particular person I’d be direct and say so, not beat around the bush trying to appear glamorous – but probably looking foolish instead.
There were even books written to advocate and promote more encounters with partners as well as ones to reduce or limit the encounters to more reasonable number. I suspect the books pushing more sex outsold the ones to go on a diet!
I don’t know if that many people would have read the majority of self-help books and if so with so many changes could they ever stop role-playing. As for me, none piqued my interest. It was just too difficult with so many issues to choose the right journey.
